The Misnagid Becomes Chabad. How Craig's List Played A Role

                                                                                        To Be Lubavitch –

 A Contemporary Guide - Rabbi Dalfin -

                           

"Rabbi Dalfin,

                 I have a truly fascinating story to tell you.  Well, at least it is fascinating to me.  It will answer your question regarding how I heard of your book.  And I apologize up front for the length of the email.

I am 56 years old, and became frum approximately 30 years ago, shortly after I attended law school at Columbia University.  The series of events as to how I became frum are interesting enough, but I will spare you most of the details.  Suffice it to say, Hashem has bestowed tremendous kindness to me in my life. Not only did I become frum on my own, but Hashem took me away from the Modern Orthodox environment in which I initially made my decision to become frum, and placed in the yeshiva of R. Moshe Feinstein, ztl, where a Boyaner chosid in the kollel taught me for approximately 2 years, after work.  My family has been in the U.S. for generations (originally from Belarus, a town called Radoshkovichi), Both my father and mother's families are totally assimilated, and in fact every first cousin of mine who is married, is married to a goy.  When you are the only frum person in your entire extended family, you feel a strong sense of having been "selected" - but why Hashem chose to select me, I don't know.  

For close to 30 years I have lived the life of a more right-wing litivishe Jew.  And, I am sad to say, I was ANTI- Chabad.  I thought Chabad chassidim were all ignoramuses, running around with "Yechi" yarmulkes trying to convince the world that their Rebbe was moshiach.  

In early 2011, I opened up my own law office in Manhattan.  It's a small operation - just me.  Anyway, on Erev Shabbos, a couple of Chabad bochurim came to my floor, and asked me whether I'd mind their coming by my office.   I met with them - and continued to meet with them every Erev Shabbos.  To put it mildly, they proceeded to destroy many misconceptions I had about Chabad.  In fact, my meeting with the bochurim became a highlight of my week, and much time would be spent with me.  Ultimately, I started to learn Tanya - and I loved it. One should not take that for granted!  That too, is a brocha from Hashem - that I was imbued with an appreciation for chassidus.  If i were to show members of my shul in New Jersey the Tanya I was learning, trust me, 90% of them would respond, "Get that narishkeit out of my face!"  Tanya may be for every Jew, but every Jew is not (yet) ready to learn chassidus.   I then started doing Chitas (I subscribe to Chayenu, and listen to various shiurim).

Now for how I got to your book.  During the first week of July, I had seen your video on "Chabad Lite."  As I was learning Chitas, I looked up and thought, "Who am I kidding? I will always be nothing more than Chabad Lite! I am living in a misnagdishe community, and I don't have even the basics of what a Chabad chosid has."  I thought specifically of 2 items - Rabbeinu Tam tefillin and Chabad talleism.  I was not going to buy a pair a Rabbeinu Tam tefillin, because of the cost (my wife would have probably killed me!) and the talleism - well, I couldn't see myself going out to Crown Heights to buy them, and besides, I had a perfectly good non-Chabad tallis in my house.  I sadly became resigned to a life of Chabad Lite.  

 And then, came motzei Shabbos.

Sometimes, I'll take a look at the items people give away for free on Craig's List, an online collection of classified ads.  About ninety percent of the ads for free items on Craig's List are people giving away their junk - broken down furniture, old books, chachkas, etc.  When I look on the New York Craig's List, I look only at the Manhattan ads, since I work in Manhattan.  Yet, shortly before I went to bed, after midnight, I looked at items being given away for free on the "All of New York" section of Craig's List, which included Brooklyn, Queens, southern Connecticut, Staten Island, etc..  As I said, I never do that, because it includes parts of the New York City area I'd never go to.

And then I spotted it.

It was posted in the Brooklyn Craigs List - where again, I would never normally look, but it came up because I was looking, for some reason, at all ads in the Greater New York area.

A very strange and unusual ad.  I must say, when I saw it, my eyes almost popped out of my head.

"Free tallis and Chabad Rabbeinu Tam tefillin. I am upgrading, and I have a beautiful tallis and magnificent tefillin (alter rebbe ksav) to give away. Email me your story and why you want them."

The ad was originally posted June 30th, and then reposted July 7th (after midnight), just when I started to look.

Initially, I thought, "Why would someone give these items away on Craig's List? Why not make a few phone calls to friends/family instead?

I wrote back, and told the individual who posted the ad of my story, about how I was anti-Chabad for many years, but have come around within the past couple of years, due to the bochurim visiting my office on erev Shabboses. The bochurim slowly won me over with their sincerity and ahavas yisroel.  I added that I now learn chassidus daily, and if I got these items, to me, it would be "min Ha-Shomayim," and that I would use these items every day.

The person wrote back, "Do you have an address?"  By now, it was 12:30 AM.

Since I did not know who I was dealing with, I provided my New York office address.

He then wrote, "I will be sending them to you. Use them well."

I quickly wrote, "If you are in Brooklyn, I would be honored to meet you and thank you personally."

He responded, "It's okay, I'm not in New York very often.  Just use them well."

In an instant, the ad was deleted, as though it had never existed.

Subsequently, I received an email that the items were being shipped by insured mail, and that I would receive them on Wednesday, July 10th.  Keep in mind, I still had no idea who the person was or where the items were coming from.

On Wednesday, when I returned to my office from court, a large box was in my office.  I looked at the return address.  The box was from "A. Yachad," with a post office box in Sharon, Massachusetts.  Inside the box were 2 Chabad talleisim and the Rabbeinu Tam tefillin.  I had the tefillin checked out by a Chabad sofer, R. Tuvia Simon, who informed me that the parshios were actually Arizal ksav, rather than Alter Rebbe ksav, and that they were in excellent condition.  

What were the chances that shortly after thinking about these specific items, I would find an ad giving away these items on Craig's List, of all places?   In fact, the ONLY way I would have obtained them was through such a manner!  And you would never see such items on Craig's List, of all places!

To this day, I don't know who gave me the tefillin and talleism.   But if ever the phrase "min -HaShomayim" applies, I believe it applies here.  I view my receiving these items as a sort of confirmation that I should continue the path I'm on.

And the first time I wore one of the chabad tallesim in my shul, I was given the aliyah with the aseros hadibros,

So, due to your video, I looked you up on line.  You seem to have conviction in what Chabad chassidus is, and what a Chabad chosid should be.  And this is the help that I need right now.  On my own, in recent months, in addition to Chitas, I took on keeping cholov yisroel, putting on the Rabbeinu Tam tefillin daily after saying tehillim, going to the mikva every morning, and growing my beard.  (Actually, my mother was niftar on chof Elul, and I kept the beard since then).  But these are chitzonious, by and large.  I need to know the essence of what makes a good chosid and I suspect that your book may be of some assistance."

The lessons of this story are MANY: 

1. The MANY details of Hashgacha Protis etc..

2. The impact a Bochur can have just from Friday's mivtzoim. Even on a frumer yid. The bochur on mivtzoim IS the "ADVERTISEMENT" for Chassidus & Lubavitch. Note that it was the bochurim's "sincerity and ahavas yisroel" that won him over. The bochur who is a proper role model has the power to "destroy" the previously held false notions about chassidus of an "ANTI", and to be an instrument of Ohr v'Chayos that brings awesome benefits.

3. The impact of a short YouTube clip of Chassidus (Torah). Never underestimate the power of 

"Makifim she'be'makifim". One can be farbrenging or giving a shiur in chassidus, without having a particular person in mind, and, moreover, the person viewing didn't really invest much into his "involvement" with this clip (he didn't pay for it, you can't really say he's seriously concentrating, and he doesn't even really know what's he going to see..); still, that clip can be the cause of a major transformation in many a future viewers life. You just never know what could be the results of your talk/shiur etc.

4. The impact of a Mitzvah - good "old-fashioned", maasim tovim. Gemilas Chassodim. How it inspired the recipient on so many levels. (And the act itself. Think about it. There's doing acts of kindness [tzedokoh] and there's doing acts of kindness. The details of care and concern of this chesed - mitzvah - are worthy of Avrohom Avinu: 1. The person went looking for someone to help.(placed an ad). 2. Went out of his way - in an unusual way - thought "out of the box". (didn't just take his talis & tefillin and leave it in his local shule to be used as a spare for whenever..). 3. Matan Ba'seser. In tzedokoh, from the highest levels. 4. Top level. Quality. Class. I can think of many people that would give away their old tefillin etc., but they would tell the recipient when he can come and pick it up, it's still a great "deal" - 2 talleisim and a good pair of tefillin for free!!! But I can't think of many people that would've done it in such a way as to even go ahead and pay the cost of insured shipping. 

Tachlis: The Friediker wrote often of the concept of "Chovas La'sois Li'maan Chassidus - The Obligationto play an active role in the "Cause of Chassidus"" - as in Hayom Yom 21 Menachem Av:

 "Activism on behalf of the ways of Chassidus means that even when a chassid is in the marketplace, deeply involved in his business, he still thinks about what he can do for chassidic concerns and the welfare of chassidim. When he encounters a business acquaintance among the market people he should seek to persuade him to attend the shi'urim (public study sessions) in Chassidus, or to attend a farbrengen.

Activism on behalf of the ways of Chassidus is a personal obligation, regardless whether one is great or limited in knowledge of Chassidus."